she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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