It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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