Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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