Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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