Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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