i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
