i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize