If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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