I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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