none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
