Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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