she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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