No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
