just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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