But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
please come you make the beer taste better
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
