my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
