Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
