i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
