ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
