We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
