My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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