I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
