Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
