Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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