I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
