I think I am morally bankrupt
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
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