About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Girls should come with a carfax report
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
