PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
