Bisexual people are plain selfish.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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