So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Say something about gay babies.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
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This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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