Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
