Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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