i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
