soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
