I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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