I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
