were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Randomize
