Nicole vs. Life
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize