To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
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I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
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Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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