We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
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