You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
