I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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