when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It's shark week go big or go home
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
