wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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