new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
We need a shit load of segways right now
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
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