are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
