He kissed a someone with a penis
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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