why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I have tasted many bathrooms
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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