Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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