Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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